Wednesday, May 9, 2007

Forgive me My Dear ...

What’s that one thing we should never do to a friend in need? Leave them alone without even trying to help. That’s what I did yesterday and I felt like a jerk! After lunch yesterday, I went to the restroom. As soon as the door opened, I was surprised to see a good friend of mine by herself and in tears. There was no one else, just me and her. Her work issues seems to be the cause of her tears. I asked if I could help her in anyway but she briefly said she needed a good cry. From the look on her face, she needed more than that. I wish I could be that someone she can turn to for whatever reason. But I can't as I had to keep my distance due to our recent misunderstandings. I felt reluctant to leave her alone as she needed someone to be there with her. My conscience says she needed to be left alone but my heart says otherwise. Afraid of complicating our situation, I reluctantly excused myself and left her alone. That was the most insensitive thing I've ever done to anyone!! The worst part is that I didn’t even try to talk to her.

When I reached my cubicle, I couldn't think or concentrate on anything. I was disappointed with myself for leaving her without even trying to help. Seriously, what’s the worst thing that could happen? She may get upset with me for making things even worst between us but at least it would help to release all of her emotions. I don’t mind being her ‘punching bag’ as long as she feels better. The pain would remind me to be more sensitive towards other's misery.

In fear of losing what's left of our friendship, I sms to say how deeply sorry I was and will try to help her in anyway. If she reply, I would instantly run back to her. Unfortunately, there's no response. I started to feel worried and restless. I decided to check on her and pledged to comfort her by putting aside our misunderstanding just for that moment. To my dismay, someone else was already there to console her. I was like 10 minutes too late to make things right. Although I was glad to see her smile again but deep down inside, I was disappointed for not being the one who washed away her tears. Now, I'm the one holding back mine. 

My dear ... 
I’m truly sorry for being so insensitive. Please give me another chance to prove I'm still worthy of being your friend.

Take care … 
XOXO