Saturday, April 5, 2008

Alone ...

I just can’t stop bleeding for the last few months. Couple of my close friends keep leaving. They come and go just like a flowing river … no one stays for good. I don’t mind the distance but I do mind the silence after separation, eventually they'll fade away. I have to keep myself busy to disregard the misery within. All I want to do is to stop bleeding and start living. 

The truth is they weren’t meant for me from beginning. I was lying to myself. I wanted so much to be with whoever I thought would be ‘the one’, but none of them ever was. I even convinced myself that I’m capable to love them and be loved in return. But love was never there, it was more of a lie instead. I made myself believed they needed me when I’m the one who needed them the most. 

I’m not sure if I’ll find that someone in this life. Maybe I’m not capable to go through any kind of relationship. That’s why I’m not blessed with one yet. But I’m not willing to go through life alone. I really want someone to be there for me, someone who wants me as much as I want her. There’s no right or wrong, just as long as we can get along. What matters most is we both compliment each other. I pray someday ‘The One’ will come and lead me the way.

Dear Love, 
Come to me … Hold me close.
Take my hand … Never let me go. 
XOXO 

Celine Dion - Alone
I hear the ticking of the clock
I'm lying here, the room's pitch dark 
I wonder where you are tonight 
No answer on the telephone 
And the night goes by so very slow 
Oh I hope that it won't end though 
Alone 

Till now I always got by on my own 
I never really cared until I met you 
And now it chills me to the bone 
How do I get you alone 

You don't know how long i have wanted 
To touch your lips and hold you tight 
You don't know how long I have waited 
And I was going to tell you tonight 
But the secret is still my own 
And my love for you is still unknown 
Alone 

Till now I always got by on my own 
I never really cared until I met you 
And now it chills me to the bone 
How do I get you alone
Alone