Wednesday, May 9, 2007

Forgive me My Dear ...

What’s the thing that one should never do to a friend in need - leave them alone without even trying to help. That’s what I did yesterday and I felt like a jerk!

After lunch yesterday, I went to the restroom on the way back to my cubicle. As soon as the door was opened, I was surprised to find a good friend of mine, by herself and in tears. There was no one else there, just me and her. Her work issues seems to be the cause of her tears. I asked if I could help her in anyway but she briefly said she needed a good cry. From the look on her face, she needed more than that. I wish I could be that someone she can turn to anytime for whatever reason. But I can't as I had to keep my distance due to our recent misunderstanding. I felt reluctant to leave her alone as she needed someone to be with her. My conscience says she needs to be alone but my heart says otherwise. Afraid of complicating our situation, I excused myself and left her to cry alone. That was the most insensitive thing I've ever did for a friend. The worst part is that I didn’t even try to talk to her.

When I reached my cubicle, I couldn't think or concentrate on anything. I was disappointed with myself for leaving her without even trying to help. Seriously, what’s the worst thing can happen? She may get upset with me for making things worst but at least her anger would help to release all her emotions. I don’t mind being her ‘punching bag’ as long as she feels better. The pain would actually remind me to be more sensitive towards other's misery.

In fear of losing our friendship, I sent her an sms to tell how deeply sorry I was and will try to help her in some ways. If she replies, I would instantly run back to her. Unfortunately, there was no reply. I felt worried and restless. I decided to check on her and pledged to comfort her by putting aside the situation between us for that moment. To my dismay, someone else was already there to console her. I was like 15 minutes too late to make things right. Although I was happy to see her smile again, deep down inside, I was totally disappointed for not being the one to wash away her tears. Now, I'm one holding back the tears.

X .. I’m truly sorry for being so insensitive. Please give me another chance to prove I'm still worthy of being your friend.

Take care …



Random Magus said...

Hey we are all human. Don't be so tough on yourself sometimes in situations like this our minds blank out. You cared enough to sms her and then you went back and checked... so don't beat yourself about it.
We all get pretty awkward around personal situations.

Bridget Jones said...

Hi Random. Thanks for the comforting words. Probably I care n worried too much. Shud learn 2 improve myself rather than feel sorry for whatever mistakes I've done. Btw, luv yr blog contents. Will visit often. Take care :)